Daylight Savings Time annoys me. For most people, it’s only the first day. You get that joyful jingle, “Spring ahead!”, as a reminder, and the next thing you know you’re riding a runaway Sunday, body dragging like a caveman’s knuckles. It’s as if you lost five hours sleep, not one. No one can explain why. Like tales about animals, it’s just so.
When I was young (during the Rutherford B. Hayes Administration), Daylight Savings was restricted to five months or so. Since then it has grown like a malignant cancer. It now begins in the shallow end of March’s pool and spans all the way to November. Last year in the Boston Globe, I even read a proposal that we dispense with Eastern Standard Time completely. “Year-round Daylight Savings!” the maniac proclaimed.
It was then that I realized that the meddlers were out of control. I had thought they were confined to Congress, but I was mistaken.
I know what you’re thinking: Lord help us when Congressmen (known for doing nothing or, in this case, worse) begin to legislate time. Your instincts are correct. Only God should legislate time, and He hasn’t introduced legislation since Biblical times. I’d say that is a slight hint that we back off.
Me, I’d prefer to see the time of day like all fore of my fathers did. Thomas Jefferson. Ben Franklin. George Washington. John Adams. Why should the sun rise and set slower for me than it did for them? Why should I enjoy more time to suntan than, say, Thomas Paine did?
The short answer is “I shouldn’t.” In fact, to rebut the Globe maniac’s article, I suggest we dispense with Daylight Savings altogether. Leave well enough alone, as James Monroe once said (Chapter 3, Verse 58, “The Monroe Doctrine”). Life would not only be smoother in the world, it’d be smoother in this house, where my wife and I would no longer argue whether clocks should be changed before going to bed or upon waking.
Did our fore fathers (and fore mothers) fight over such things? Case (and DST) closed.